Beyoncé checked into NYCs Lennox Hill Hospital on the Upper East Side under the name Ingrid Jackson, yesterday afternoon.She booked out the entire fourth floor, spending $1.3million? I still don’t believe it’s her baby. Why would anybody book the entire floor of a Hospital? Well when Beyoncé announced that she was pregnant during this year’s Video Music Awards, fans, the press and naysayers alike all want to know the same thing: Is Beyoncé’s baby bump for realsies? In one corner, fans are rooting for Beyoncé, standing by their girl and her proclamations that she is indeed carrying Jay-Z‘s baby. But in the other corner, naysayers are calling shenanigans to Bey and her bump, convinced that there’s no bun baking in her oven. We have no idea what is true and what isn’t, but look at these?
CONSPIRACY THEORY #1: THE DUE DATE
In October on the Australian TV show Sunday Night, Beyoncé announced that her child was due in Feburary 2012.
According to the naysayers… Sorry Bey, but the math just doesn’t add up! A video released today (above) shows Bey gushing about her pregnancy and showing off a rather large baby bump on the set of “Countdown,” which was filmed on September 23, 2011. In the video, Beyoncé states that she is 6 months pregnant… which would make her 9 months pregnant in December… and 9 months is traditionally the point at which the baby decides to emerge from the womb… so it looks like Mamma Bey needs to get her story straight!
“Don’t be ridiculous,” say the fans… Beyoncé is known for being extremely private, and any discrepancies here can be explained away by the simple fact that Bey wants her real due date to remain a secret. There’s a reason this video came out, and moreover a reason why Bey is so careful to state the date at the start — Beyoncé doesn’t do anything by accident, and fans believe this is perfectly engineered to keep the birth as private as possible, much like her wedding to Jay-Z, the actual event of which was kept closely under wraps.
CONSPIRACY THEORY #2: THE DANCING AT ROSELAND
Beyoncé has just released her Live At Roseland: Elements Of 4 DVD, which was filmed over four nights at New York’s Roseland Ballroom in August, when, according to the above video, the pop star would have been 5 months pregnant.
The naysayers cry… All that dancing! In those heels! That can’t be safe or possible at 5 months pregnant!
The fans respond… Naysayer, you clearly don’t know anything about being pregnant! Of course she can dance. It’s probably even good for the baby or something. Just look at this Zumba instructor working it at 8 months pregnant, teaching a class (which can last from anywhere between 30 and 60 minutes)!
CONSPIRACY THEORY #3: THE CASE OF CURIOUS CLEAVAGE
At the premiere of her Live At Roseland DVD, Beyoncé’s boobs appeared, uh, strange, as she participated in a Q & A before the screening.
This is a good one for the naysayers… Look at her boobies! Look! That’s not normal! That odd gappy thing between them, they look like prosthetics! Crushable even went as far as to determine that Bey was wearing a black bra, so the strange, flesh toned irregularities couldn’t be blamed on that. It seems unequivocal, Beyoncé has temporarily enhanced the size of her breasts to make her fake pregnancy even more believable.
The fans aren’t convinced… Photos of Bey outside the venue show her breasts looking large, supple and completely unenhanced. Perhaps she’s sitting in a way that has squashed them strangely, some bad shadows have been cast on her, or it’s just an unflattering photo? In the worst case, maybe she is enhancing her boobs. But who cares? She’s still totally pregnant.
CONSPIRACY THEORY #4: THE FOLDING BABY BUMP
On the Australian TV show Sunday Night (video below), Beyoncé’s baby bump appeared to collapse as she sat down. Check out that image above, courtesy of SandraRose.com.
THIS IS ALL THE PROOF THE NAYSAYERS NEED! Are you kidding? Her bump literally FOLDS as she sits down. Of course it’s fake. Real pregnant bellies don’t just fold up at will. Shenanigans!
The fans still aren’t convinced… Upon closer inspection, it appears that Bey’s belly is no collapsing, but rather that her dress has a voluminous panel which, unfortunately, happened to fold in an awkward way when she sat down. Moreover, Sunday Night released the following video showing Bey taking her seat from behind, and while you can see her VPL (visible panty line) there’s no sign of anything that would be holding a prosthetic baby bump to her belly. Nada.
CONSPIRACY THEORY #5: THE FAMILY CONFESSION
Beyoncé’s own cousin has allegedly come out and stated that her pregnancy is fake, and that a surrogate is actually carrying the baby.
The naysayers sigh… Fans, you are so annoying. Her own cousin says it’s a fake!
The fans hold strong… Oh, this is just tabloid news with no solid evidence to back it up (given that we don’t believe any of the ‘evidence’ put forth above). We bet her cousin just wanted to make a quick buck.
CONSPIRACY THEORY #6: THE JAMAICAN BEACH SCENE
Beyoncé celebrated her 30th birthday with Jay-Z in Jamaica during September, and stepped out in a bikini revealing her baby bump.
The naysayers still aren’t convinced… Pfft, if we pushed out our bellies we’d look preggers, too. Or maybe this is some Rick Baker style Hollywood magic.
But the fans say enough’s enough… That’s a pregnant belly. Right there in the flesh. No prosthetics in sight! Game, set, match: BEYONCÉ IS PREGNANT FOR REALSIES!
CONSPIRACY THEORY #7: WATCHING THE THRONE INSTEAD OF WATCHING THE CRIB
Jay-Z’s Watch The Throne tour is still kicking across America, and won’t wrap until December 18.
The naysayers scoff… If Beyoncé really is going to give birth in December, as the evidence accrued above would suggest, when what is her husband doing on tour? Moreover, the tour was announced on July 27, at which point Bey would have been a whole 4 months into the pregnancy. It seems like a very strange decision for a husband to make — even a super star husband with a new record out — when his wife is carrying their first born.
The fans scoff harder… No rest for the wicked! Hov has fans to please and a new record to promote. We’ve got no doubt that the second Bey’s water breaks Jay will hop in his diamond encrusted private jet and be by her side within mere hours — he’s still in the country, after all!
So, there’s the evidence (or, depending on your perspective, lack thereof)
but like I said Why would anybody book the entire floor of a Hospital???